Today’s blog is a continuation from last week’s on The Four Horsemen, styles of communication identified by The Gottman Institute that can predict the end of a relationship. Last blog, I covered criticism and contempt, so will wrap up today with defensiveness and stonewalling.Read More
On today’s blog, I’m going to be sharing some information related to Gottman Method Couples Therapy. I have previously focused on Emotionally-Focused Therapy in blogs related to couples therapy, as this is the approach that I have training in. The Gottman Method is another approach to couples therapy that is based in research, and I have started taking training courses in it. I love learning and exploring different way to conceptualize relationships so that I can support clients in the best way possible.Read More
Conversations can sometimes go off of the rails simply because of a misunderstanding. One of the biggest misunderstands that I encounter is that the people engaged in the conversations are not on the same page in terms of what needs an individual is looking to be met through the conversation. Here is a simple example:Read More
In my last blog, I focused on the behavior and perception aspects of the negative cycle, as described in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT). This post will focus emotions and needs. My goal is that this provides some useful information or a jumping off point for exploring your own cycles. For many couples, working with a therapist is incredibly useful in the process of flushing out negative cycles and undergoing the changing necessary to develop a cycle that promotes closeness and connection. I also highly recommend the book Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson.Read More
This month on the blog, I am going to share core concepts related to the form of couples therapy that I utilize in sessions- Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT). You can see a previous blog for an overview of the model.
The concept of a negative cycle is central to EFT. The negative cycle is the pattern of the interaction that has developed between partners- the cycle includes behaviors, perceptions, emotions, and needs for each partner. I am going to focus on behaviors and perceptions in this blog, and will focus on emotions and needs in the next blog. Each of these cycle components interact and create a feedback loop.Read More