Perfectionism

The problem with perfectionism is that [newsflash] perfection is unattainable. When you are bound to perfectionism as a means of coping with shame, you might find yourself avoiding enjoyable activities because of the fear that you will perform imperfectly and then be subject to the pain of shame. You may find yourself confined to the space of what is comfortable, familiar, or “easy”. Growth and change come from discomfort or trying something new. Feeling “stuck” can be a product of perfectionism keeping you from growth and change.

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Self-Defeating Beliefs

Similar to thinking errors, self-defeating beliefs can go unnoticed and unchecked- silently wreaking havoc on relationships with yourself and with others. The “self-defeating” aspect of these beliefs stems from the fact that these beliefs are unrealistic; so while you may hold on dearly to these beliefs, it is fundamentally impossible for you to live up to these beliefs, and thus, you are constantly letting yourself down.

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